1di·et
noun \ˈdī-ət\1
: food and drink regularly provided or consumed
2
: habitual nourishment
3
: the kind and amount of food prescribed for a person or animal for a special reason
I just recently had my first colonoscopy, January 19, and gained 2 pounds. Who gains weight after having had nothing but 278 fluid ounces in 50 hours? I do! Following the colonoscopy, I decided it would probably be healthier to switch to low calorie versus low carbohydrate. I had the crazy notion that although I had been doing low carb with great success, long term, it would be healthier to follow a low calorie plan for life. Also, after two-and-a-half months of low carb, I was really craving fruit, cereal and vegetables. Due to being on this weight loss journey along with my husband and appreciating the fact that he does 80% of the meal preparation, I thought the switch would be best. However, I did not, in my thought process, take into account the fact that the husband get's 2 times as many calories as I am allowed. This is the first problem I would like to address with you.
Men lose weight more quickly because they are comprised of more muscle mass, which in turn causes their bodies to shed weight much more rapidly than women that are blessed with increased fat cells for child bearing purposes, and in my observations, men typically actually enjoy consuming water, just naturally without counting the number of glasses they have consumed before noon. I am sure that fluid consumption, or lack of, plays a huge part in ridding our bodies of waste. Ah, elimination! Most women I talk to experience at least mild constipation on a regular basis. Not typically so with men.
Secondly, I would like to share with you how long this self loathing struggle with weight has been going on for me. I remember my very first diet, and the very first time my family decided I was getting chubby. I was 10 years old, prepubescent, 5'2 and 119 pounds, June of 1967. Let me say here, my sister in law was a Beauty Pageant Queen, REALLY! She was 5'8, weighed 125 pounds and had a 20" inch waist. I don't have these numbers and facts written down anywhere, they are permanently etched in my soul! Due to the "family concern" about my weight, my mother bought a Donna Reed diet and exercise book for me as well as buying me a "health spa" membership. I was the only child at Holiday Health Spa, for years! I remember wearing the electric fat shaker jiggle belt and lying on the wooden fat rollers, which by the way was the cause of my first stretch marks that summer of 1967. Those blissful days of just simply being a care free kid, playing outdoors, being naturally active, and basically being concerned with everything other than my weight were over. Right then and there, OVER!!! From that moment on, I have counted every calorie that I have consumed, whether actively dieting or not.
Changing hats and becoming the mental health professional for a moment, I would like to ask all of you to think about what you are teaching your children. Not only through your behavior, how you eat, your work out habits, but also through what you project onto them about eating habits, dieting habits, who you admire for their appearance and who you admire and emulate because they are a scholar or humanitarian, the magazines you leaf through and admire. Sorry, that is a whole other topic I'm sure we will talk about soon. My motivation for this blog, is actually all about appearance...As my husband says, "you women dress and diet for each other". Men typically are not too concerned with a little extra weight on themselves or their partners. I know this to be true in my life as well as the thousands of women I have worked with in my career. Our image concerns affect our mental health, our physical health, our physical and intimate relationships and on and on. We are obsessed as a society, with thinness and perfection. Through medical advancements, we are getting closer and closer all the time to a cure for fat absorption and also through plastic surgery, the eternal fountain of youth. I can't count the number of ridiculous looking women who have the faces of a 35 year old and the voice, hands and physical health of a 70 year old. The number of women who are having plastic surgery prior to the age of 50 has increased by 50% over the last 10 years. Perfection is becoming attainable to the masses. But is that look better? I really don't think so. I want my eyes to shut when I sleep and blink, but I have to tell you, I am really tired of tucking my boobs in my pants. Oh, and this extra skin that I now have that falls over my panties. Those problems never occurred in my previous weight loss endeavors. My body got very comfortable being heavy. It kind of filled out the creases. At my last class reunion, everyone remarked at how flawless my skin was. As I informed them, 50 year old's that are heavy, don't typically have the loose skin issues thinner women have; those only occur following the weight loss. Also, I don't know about you, but something about weighing 200+ pounds took the joy out of sunbathing... Although, we do live smack in the middle of 50 acres, so I have been getting a nice even tan without the worry of vanity thanks to my blow up pool and the fact that no mirror in our home is below shoulder level.
Just briefly, I would like to get serious for a moment to talk about disordered eating. I have weighed as little as 92 pounds; that was November of 1991 and as much as 276 pounds in September of 2002. I have starved, dieted, vomited, purged, binged, worked out to the point of hospitalization due to exhaustion, and gained the same 5000 pounds over and over again in the past 44 years. I have lost 80 pounds 2 X and 100 pounds once before. I have dieted before every holiday, special occasion, vacation, wedding, summer, job interview, dance, date, blah, blah, blah. I possess the special ability of being able to look at any picture of myself and tell you exactly what I weighed at the time. Yes, from the time I was 10 on, I have possessed that ability. ALL because, my weight became important at a time of life that had I been allowed to be a typical, chubby, prepubescent child that had put on a few extra pounds prior to a puberty and a growth spurt, judging by the rest of my family, I too would have probably not been a disordered eater or had this life long struggle with weight.
I am going to share with you my professional skills that have brought to the place I am today. I am working at loving myself, being kind to myself, and giving myself the kind of love and support you give to your best friend or a family member who is struggling. It is working!!! For the first time in my life, I don't have a deadline for that magic number to appear on the scale that will make me feel fabulous about myself. I do have a number in mind, 160, but not a time frame. By the way, I am 5'9", and I happen to know 160 pounds for me puts me in a size 10. The old me is saying, 160 pounds? That's still too heavy, IT IS NOT!!! It is perfectly healthy and in the middle of the standardized insurance weight charts. Secretly, out of habit, the number 120 keeps spinning in my head. That is ridiculous! Let me say it again, RIDICULOUS!!! I have to tell you this is working. It has taken the pressure off of being a failure. For me, it's about being gentle with myself, and looking at myself in the mirror and saying " you are doing a great job" or "you are making great progress". I am also documenting the physical and psychological changes I am going through week by week.
I look forward to sharing this journey with you. Hopefully we can support one another and share tips on self love and how we are overcoming self loathing.
Until Next Time, Carrie T.
I just recently had my first colonoscopy, January 19, and gained 2 pounds. Who gains weight after having had nothing but 278 fluid ounces in 50 hours? I do! Following the colonoscopy, I decided it would probably be healthier to switch to low calorie versus low carbohydrate. I had the crazy notion that although I had been doing low carb with great success, long term, it would be healthier to follow a low calorie plan for life. Also, after two-and-a-half months of low carb, I was really craving fruit, cereal and vegetables. Due to being on this weight loss journey along with my husband and appreciating the fact that he does 80% of the meal preparation, I thought the switch would be best. However, I did not, in my thought process, take into account the fact that the husband get's 2 times as many calories as I am allowed. This is the first problem I would like to address with you.
Men lose weight more quickly because they are comprised of more muscle mass, which in turn causes their bodies to shed weight much more rapidly than women that are blessed with increased fat cells for child bearing purposes, and in my observations, men typically actually enjoy consuming water, just naturally without counting the number of glasses they have consumed before noon. I am sure that fluid consumption, or lack of, plays a huge part in ridding our bodies of waste. Ah, elimination! Most women I talk to experience at least mild constipation on a regular basis. Not typically so with men.
Secondly, I would like to share with you how long this self loathing struggle with weight has been going on for me. I remember my very first diet, and the very first time my family decided I was getting chubby. I was 10 years old, prepubescent, 5'2 and 119 pounds, June of 1967. Let me say here, my sister in law was a Beauty Pageant Queen, REALLY! She was 5'8, weighed 125 pounds and had a 20" inch waist. I don't have these numbers and facts written down anywhere, they are permanently etched in my soul! Due to the "family concern" about my weight, my mother bought a Donna Reed diet and exercise book for me as well as buying me a "health spa" membership. I was the only child at Holiday Health Spa, for years! I remember wearing the electric fat shaker jiggle belt and lying on the wooden fat rollers, which by the way was the cause of my first stretch marks that summer of 1967. Those blissful days of just simply being a care free kid, playing outdoors, being naturally active, and basically being concerned with everything other than my weight were over. Right then and there, OVER!!! From that moment on, I have counted every calorie that I have consumed, whether actively dieting or not.
Changing hats and becoming the mental health professional for a moment, I would like to ask all of you to think about what you are teaching your children. Not only through your behavior, how you eat, your work out habits, but also through what you project onto them about eating habits, dieting habits, who you admire for their appearance and who you admire and emulate because they are a scholar or humanitarian, the magazines you leaf through and admire. Sorry, that is a whole other topic I'm sure we will talk about soon. My motivation for this blog, is actually all about appearance...As my husband says, "you women dress and diet for each other". Men typically are not too concerned with a little extra weight on themselves or their partners. I know this to be true in my life as well as the thousands of women I have worked with in my career. Our image concerns affect our mental health, our physical health, our physical and intimate relationships and on and on. We are obsessed as a society, with thinness and perfection. Through medical advancements, we are getting closer and closer all the time to a cure for fat absorption and also through plastic surgery, the eternal fountain of youth. I can't count the number of ridiculous looking women who have the faces of a 35 year old and the voice, hands and physical health of a 70 year old. The number of women who are having plastic surgery prior to the age of 50 has increased by 50% over the last 10 years. Perfection is becoming attainable to the masses. But is that look better? I really don't think so. I want my eyes to shut when I sleep and blink, but I have to tell you, I am really tired of tucking my boobs in my pants. Oh, and this extra skin that I now have that falls over my panties. Those problems never occurred in my previous weight loss endeavors. My body got very comfortable being heavy. It kind of filled out the creases. At my last class reunion, everyone remarked at how flawless my skin was. As I informed them, 50 year old's that are heavy, don't typically have the loose skin issues thinner women have; those only occur following the weight loss. Also, I don't know about you, but something about weighing 200+ pounds took the joy out of sunbathing... Although, we do live smack in the middle of 50 acres, so I have been getting a nice even tan without the worry of vanity thanks to my blow up pool and the fact that no mirror in our home is below shoulder level.
Just briefly, I would like to get serious for a moment to talk about disordered eating. I have weighed as little as 92 pounds; that was November of 1991 and as much as 276 pounds in September of 2002. I have starved, dieted, vomited, purged, binged, worked out to the point of hospitalization due to exhaustion, and gained the same 5000 pounds over and over again in the past 44 years. I have lost 80 pounds 2 X and 100 pounds once before. I have dieted before every holiday, special occasion, vacation, wedding, summer, job interview, dance, date, blah, blah, blah. I possess the special ability of being able to look at any picture of myself and tell you exactly what I weighed at the time. Yes, from the time I was 10 on, I have possessed that ability. ALL because, my weight became important at a time of life that had I been allowed to be a typical, chubby, prepubescent child that had put on a few extra pounds prior to a puberty and a growth spurt, judging by the rest of my family, I too would have probably not been a disordered eater or had this life long struggle with weight.
I am going to share with you my professional skills that have brought to the place I am today. I am working at loving myself, being kind to myself, and giving myself the kind of love and support you give to your best friend or a family member who is struggling. It is working!!! For the first time in my life, I don't have a deadline for that magic number to appear on the scale that will make me feel fabulous about myself. I do have a number in mind, 160, but not a time frame. By the way, I am 5'9", and I happen to know 160 pounds for me puts me in a size 10. The old me is saying, 160 pounds? That's still too heavy, IT IS NOT!!! It is perfectly healthy and in the middle of the standardized insurance weight charts. Secretly, out of habit, the number 120 keeps spinning in my head. That is ridiculous! Let me say it again, RIDICULOUS!!! I have to tell you this is working. It has taken the pressure off of being a failure. For me, it's about being gentle with myself, and looking at myself in the mirror and saying " you are doing a great job" or "you are making great progress". I am also documenting the physical and psychological changes I am going through week by week.
I look forward to sharing this journey with you. Hopefully we can support one another and share tips on self love and how we are overcoming self loathing.
Until Next Time, Carrie T.
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